Now

Every. Single. Day.

This is tough, I mean it really is. It’s easy to fall into self loathing and then into guilt because you know “it could always be worse.” Why is that everyone’s favorite thing to say? It’s not helpful, it’s just frustrating. I, and fellow chronically ill people, do not need you to tell us it could always be worse. We are fully capable of comprehending that there are people in a situation that is worse than our own. However, on the same coin, we see the other side and know how much better it could be.

Some of us miss our old lives, some of us miss the lives we never had. Yet, despite it all we push forward. Through every bad day, we cry (or I do) and then move on. Some of us medicate, others journal, some talk about it and others burry it deep inside.

You and I, we are all people, our daily battles just look different. While you may be complaining about getting up early for work, we are complaining about getting up to use the bathroom for the 4th time in an hour. On your way to work you yell at the slow driver in front of you, while we yell at ourselves for forgetting to take our medicine. When lunch rolls around, you’re annoyed the waitress brought you the wrong dish while we are annoyed we are too nauseous to eat. You’re evenings are spent having dinner, shopping, attending events, sporting games etc. while our evenings are spent back in bed, if we were even able to get out of bed that day.

You see, we are all the same, our battles are different, but they are still our battles to fight. Whether your wrestling getting your toddler to sleep or stuck wrestling yourself to sleep, it all sucks.

So if you don’t have a Chronic Illness, think about the hardest thing you’ve ever physically and/or mentally endured. Whether it was competing in your first marathon, childbirth, losing a loved one or whatever it was, just remember it. Remember the way you felt, when you thought you couldn’t go on. The moment that you wanted to give up because it was too hard. Remember that feeling? Maybe you cried, maybe you screamed in pain, maybe you were silent but the feeling was there. The gut wrenching, can I really make it through this fear. Remember that feeling anytime you hear about someone with chronic illness. Because that is what it’s like to live with chronic illness. Every. Single. Day.

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