Do you ever have days like that? Where everything seems impossible and you just want to sleep?
That’s me today.
I’m sore all over, my right hand keeps having these flares and I’m just exhausted. There is so many things I could be doing but I can’t bring myself to do more than lay on this couch.
My entire living room and kitchen is covered in multiple sized muddy paw prints. The constant rain we’re getting in Texas makes keeping these wood floors clean impossible. I have weeks worth of laundry to do and unopened mail dated 2 weeks ago.
I found a frozen meal for lunch, because I quickly realized there wasn’t any food in the fridge. I forgot to go to the store again. That’s something I should do today but I can’t.
I wish there was a way I could articulate how being tired these days isn’t like it was. I just say tired, because that’s a feeling most people understand. The truth of it is, I don’t even know what I’m feeling. Maybe I’m depressed? I don’t know, normally depression is associated with hopelessness, I don’t necessarily feel hopeless. What I do feel is extreme fatigue, every single square inch of my body aches. It’s not enough to require pain medicine but it’s enough to know it’s unpleasant. However, maybe pain medicine would help? I’m not sure, I’m not willing to try.
Taking pain medicine comes with its own side effects, It can become addictive overtime but really the constipation is what scares me away. I mean nobody likes having poop problems, I feel like that’s a fact.
So when I have days like this, where I don’t know if I have a virus or if it’s just chronic illness, I lay on this couch. Because in the end it doesn’t matter why I feel this way, I have learned that only time will help me.
Because like all things in life, this too shall pass.