I feel like crying and I think crying is annoying, I hate that I am so annoying.
For the first time ever, Hamilton slept through the night, which means I should be feeling amazing for getting a full nights rest. Except I woke up this morning with a super severe sore throat.
It’s like, “gosh darn it, why is it when one thing goes right something else goes wrong?”
All I know is I’ve been feeling like crap for months and months now, with practically no relief. I can’t even remember the last time I was able to go 24 hours without some sort of pain, shortness of breath or fatigue. Then on top of that, I’ve been fighting a mild cold for weeks and then today I woke up aware I was much worse than yesterday. So I called and made a doctors appointment, because I just can’t get behind the wait and see if it gets any worse mentality.
Really, I guess I should be thankful since this should mean better days are ahead. But at this current moment, I just wish I felt better now. I was supposed to go to cardiac rehab today, but I’m definitely not making it now. I haven’t been able to go in 2 weeks due to one thing or another, and I guess this will just be another reason.
It’s frustrating at times being stuck between feeling guilty for not doing something because you’re sick, and knowing you shouldn’t be doing something because you’re sick.